Yep, that’s right. I quit my 8-5, full-time job.
This was a major decision. And, like most (if not all?) major decisions, it has a story. So, if you care to the story, go grab a cuppa…somethin’…and read along.
The path
I haven’t always wanted out of the 8-5 life. In fact, once I switched my major over to accounting and finance in college, I had dreams of being the super driven, CEO-type woman, climbing up the corporate ladder. I was going to rule the world wearing high heels, working-in-a-highrise-building in some big or up-and-coming city and making a name for myself.
And that remained true for the first few years of my career.
Until about five years ago when that desire began to change and give way to something…different…and I felt the first stirrings of wanting out. Wanting to be free. Wanting to do my own thing, on my own terms, in my own time. And not wanting to be obligated to someone else’s wants.
And boy did I fight this stirring.
Usually, this is where a female might mention that the change was due to getting pregnant or having kids at home that she never saw or something similar. But not me. I simply wanted to be home, taking care of things there and doing my “own thing” to bring in an income.
But I thought that was crazy. And lazy. It felt wrong; like I hadn’t earned the right to want any of that.
I mean, I had a college degree for Pete’s sake (side note: does anyone know who Pete actually is?). I needed to put that degree to use. Staying home was not going to do that. Besides, we had a lot of debt pay off and a lot of “life” to pay for each month. I didn’t have the luxury of staying home or doing my own thing. I needed to work. It was the responsible thing to do.
But, around that same time, a friend had shared the meme on social media of a quote from Lori Greiner, one of the “sharks” on the popular TV show, Shark Tank.
When I saw that meme, I immediately resonated with it and understood that my desire to leave the 8-5 world did not mean I was lazy nor did it even mean I was irresponsible. This was the first step in making the decision to leave the corporate world.
The second came in the form of a plan.
The decision
Finally getting to the point of being okay personally with leaving employment behind was the first step in leaving my 8-5 job. The second step was to create a plan to do it; an exit strategy to break free from the 8-5 life. Scott and I did this and our plan ensured that I would exit the stability of the corporate world responsibly. Our financial house would be in order – we would be debt free, have a fully funded emergency fund and (bonus!) perhaps even be living a month ahead – and, hopefully, I would have built up another business to a point that I could bring in at least a small income.
This was our plan. We working that plan and we were making progress. We were on track to be debt free by the end of the year and that meant I could break free from the 8-5 life six-to-nine months later. Everything was fine.
Except that it wasn’t.
Or, more accurately, I wasn’t.
I was struggling. Big time. Every week, every day it was harder to get up and go to my office. Mondays were brutal while Fridays felt (briefly) freeing. And every day in between just felt heavy and stiff.
This 8-5 life that I'd enjoyed for so long just didn't seem to fit anymore; like a coat that's a few seasons too small. Share on XThis 8-5 life that I’d enjoyed for so long just didn’t seem to fit anymore; like a coat that’s a few seasons too small. Every Monday, I’d put the coat back on, feeling the tightness of it and trying to shrug it back into a comfortable place but, by Wednesday, I was suffocating. And on Friday, I’d throw that coat off and feel the freedom and flexibility of no obligations. I could breathe again!
I kept telling myself that I needed to just get over it. Lots of people don’t want to go to work. Lots of people are unhappy with their work life. And lots of people suck it up every day and do it anyway because…well…that’s the responsible thing to do. Crying about it certainly wasn’t going to change any of that so just get over it.
But, I couldn’t.
Week in and week out, the struggle just became more potent as the 8-5 life “coat” became more restrictive. The thought of six, nine, twelve or even *gasp* eighteen more months of it was overwhelming. But I felt stuck because I didn’t see a responsible way around that. Working the plan was going to take time. Leaving before the plan was complete seemed premature. But the thought of spending that much more time in this battle felt impossible.
And then I attended a church retreat in April. At the end of the three-day retreat and over the next couple of weeks, I felt like I received confirmation and permission to not only leave the job but to leave it now. All of the hows and whys and what-ifs of leaving full-time employment prematurely didn’t cease but I did come to a place of trusting that they would all be addressed in time and, in the meantime, we would be okay. And, from that point on, the decision to leave employment in pursuit of entrepreneurship was made.
The resignation
When I tendered my resignation in May, my boss was understandably shocked. Though I’d been working for the university for five years, I’d only been in my current position for a little over a year. I think he was even more surprised when he asked where I was going and I responded, “nowhere.”
My decision to leave and reason(s) for leaving a good, stable and somewhat fulfilling job doesn’t make a lot of sense for a 30-something female who’s spent the last decade working on building a career. This is usually the time when that career starts “going places” and walking away from it seems ridiculous. I get that. I even struggled (still struggle at times) with it.
But, without being able to explicitly state “why,” I know that walking away is right for me. I’d originally planned for June 19th to be my last day but, after discussions with my boss, I agreed to stay on through July 13th and then transition to a temporary, part-time position until they could get someone hired and trained to replace me.
The leaving
So, I am now officially no longer employed full-time and, at this point, I don’t intend for that to ever change. However, there are so many unknowns (seriously, so. many.). Not the least of which is what exactly I will do instead. There are ideas. There are dreams. There are even a couple of baby businesses. But there is nothing that is a full-fledged entrepreneurial pursuit, much less, anything that is producing any sort of solid income at the moment.
Instead, there is a lot of faith and trust that the Lord will reveal the “next thing(s)” in due time and that He will provide for us in the meantime.
And this is a big deal because Scott and I have not had to depend on the Lord, in this way, in our marriage yet. We’ve both been blessed to have good, stable jobs and, while we certainly weren’t living a life of luxury, we were definitely not living paycheck-to-paycheck either. We’ve also not had to depend on Him to show us how to spend our days. Our jobs took care of that just fine.
So, we’re in new faith territory. The knowledge that He is Jehova Jireh, the Lord our provider (Gen. 22:14) is about to be tested in a very new and real way for us. The monthly math doesn’t work out for us to be a one-income family. And I am such a do-er that I’m not sure I know how to just “be;” how to sit, pray and listen to the Lord’s leading on what His plan (Jer. 29:11) is for this season of my life.
But, we’re walking this road together and are willing to submit to the Lord’s guidance as we put one foot in front of the other.
What about you?
Where are you learning to trust the Lord’s guidance in your life?